In a sick sort of way, knowing someone with cancer is like being a parent. Both cancer and children are topics of conversation that form fast relationships through common understanding, interest and empathy. Children are certainly a blessing but so can cancer be. Quicker, deeper bonds are created, bonds we all want to form but don’t always know how. In general it seems we shuffle around our small talk, shyly hoping some common ground will inspire us, or relax us. The innocence of children and the horror of cancer can tear down walls.
I just chatted to three amazing ladies, all who have been touched by cancer.
The first had a father who passed from lung cancer. He broke it to her by telling her he was dying of cancer. He was given 4 months to live, did everything the doctor told him, and died 4 months later. His daughter desperately tried to encourage him to try alternative treatments but he wouldn’t. It was like he had decided to die, and nothing would shake him from that focus.
Our second lady has a mother who is battling stage 4 ovarian cancer – and winning so far. The mother had several rounds of chemo but also juiced, took turmeric capsules, was treated with Rieki and more. She has coped well with the chemo, and at present there is no sign of disease.
Our last lady knew someone – a woman – who had had bladder cancer – and fought it successfully with laughter! The woman and her partner rented every comedy they could think of and sat on the couch drinking wine and laughing for 3 months (I’m sure they had toilet breaks). Following this time period there was no sign of the cancer.
If we look at each case they are all very different, not just different types of cancer, but very different treatment methods. We have strictly conventional, holistic, and strictly alternative. I know statistics are greatly misleading at the best of times, but it is interesting to note that 2 out of the 3 cancers were treated “unconventially”, and that these were the two where the patient survived!
Everyone I speak to does not believe Nige will die. We all agree he doesn’t look sick. He is going to live. I love that we are surrounded by this unshaking faith.
I don’t hate the cancer. It is part of him “gone wrong”. Nige and I strive to bring his cancer cells back to their proper state. Homeostasis. We plan to make his immune system so healthy that the cancer cells stop dividing, or ceasing to die when they should. We do it peacefully. This makes me sound flaky but I’m not bothered. If I don’t believe Nige will get better how can I expect him to? And why shouldn’t he? The human body is made to fix itself. Others have done it. Through carrots, positive thinking, laughter, cannabis, Chinese medicine, enemas. But what do all these people have in common? The power of positive thinking. The power of mind over matter. The power of thought. All our reality is, is our perceptions. Our thoughts tell us how to process what is around us, or project out what is within us. What we think will be. Whatever way you look at it.
Yes many people who try alternative treatments die. Many people who try orthodox treatments also die. We don’t always know why. There is much that we don’t know. About death, about life, about our minds and bodies. The universe expands infinitely outwards into nothing, and as we look through microscopes it seems we could be made up of infinitely smaller and smaller parts. The more we know, the more there is to know. Will it ever end, or are our brains creating more and more mysteries to discover as we learn?
I try to delve down deeper and deeper into what can perhaps cure Nige’s cancer, searching the murky bottom for clues that someone may have missed. I analyze diet and treatment right down to the molecular levels of the body but then I call to the universe when I’m afraid and feeling weak. I search within, I search without. The more I search the more there is to know and discover. And the more I am brought back. To us.
I know what feels right to me. And that is trusting my instincts. I have rediscovered them after all these years. To many this probably sounds desperate, dangerous and crazy. But maybe it’s how we animals survive best. Without too much thought, with quiet, not noise.
I think a question that many people may find themselves asking is “what do I do?” What do I do when my partner gets sick, my child hates me, I’m angry at my mother, my job is destroying my soul, our debt is consuming us, the planet is screwed, I am unhappy with how I look, or am. What do I do?
And the answer is…….
Something different. Because as a wise man once said:
Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Albert Einstein
So thank-you, to all the new friends entering our lives, who inspire us to try new things, and encourage us to keep the faith. And thank-you to the throngs of positive people that surround us, keeping us buoyed up in rough seas. Thank-you everyone for keeping your walls down, or at least your gates open, so that we may stay our course and trust in our decisions.
You are our reality, and you make the journey a little less daunting, and the chances of success seem that much more in reach.